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2021 Weekly Song Challenge

by Key Wilde

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1.
G Ringing, my ears are ringing G I’m hearing ring-ling-ling-ling-ling G Ringa ling ling tinga ling ling G D Ring ling ling ling ling loud in my ears D7 Singing, that’s why I’m singing D7 If I can shout and sing out loud D7 Then I can fill my head with sound D7 And that sound will begin to drown D7 G The ringing in my head that won’t stop ringing G Oh Doctor, I called the doctor G I asked her can you help me please G This ringing sound is bugging me G D All I can hear is ringing in my ears D7 She said you shouldn’t worry so D7 Truth be told you’re getting old D7 The ringing’s all inside your head D7 Drink some water go to bed D7 In a hundred years we’ll all be dead D7 G Won’t do no good to worry ‘bout the ringing C If the ringing won’t stop ringing Cm Then I’ll just keep on singing G E We’ll battle til the end Am D G I just hope the singing wins
2.
B E Things I can never remember A A7 D Things that I always forget B E Things that happened a long time ago A A7 D Things that ain’t happened yet I was looking around for that thingamajig It looks like a widget but it’s not that big I went in my room and closed the door And I forgot what I rent in there for I went back out and the doorbell rang I opened the door and there was what’s her name I’m sure I met her once someplace She hangs around with what’s his face I don’t remember what she actually wanted at that particular point in time I think she was maybe selling Girl Scout cookies something like that I can’t recall Chorus I need a minute here to figure out What it was I meant to talk about There was something I was trying to find Now it seems to have slipped my mind Now it’s one thing to forget where you PUT something but when you forget altogether what it was you were looking for, well, that’s a problem and you may have to go back and retrace your steps and that’s like deja vu all over again. Now somebody famous said that - what’s his name? Baseball played named after a cartoon character
3.
F Bb F I am a mythical creature F Bb F I have some terrifical features Gm Bb C I have supernatural powers Gm Bb C I live in a far away tower F Bb F I have no sisters or brothers F Bb F It’s lonely to be undiscovered Gm Bb C I get no respect from the scientists Gm Bb C They say I don’t even exist F Bb F My story’s been told throughout history F Bb F Still I remain a great mystery Gm Bb C I have some terrifical features Gm Bb C I am a mythical creature
4.
G7/C A/Dm The last unicorn was born a thousand years ago Dm7/G G7/C She had a lovely horn and a coat that was whiter than snow G7/C A/Dm In the physical world she truly was one of a kind Dm7?G G7 C When all the other unicorns went away she stayed behind. C7/F A/Dm She lived deep in the forest and rarely was seen Dm7/G G7/C The creatures all loved her and called her their queen C7/F A/Dm But as she grew older she wanted to know Dm7/G G7 C What became of her family and where did they go She was told by a troll that these secrets could be easily learned But if she left the natural world she could never return She boarded a boat all alone and sailed away And she arrived in the make believe world on the following day Unicorns, Dinosaurs, dragons galore Called out her name as they waved from the shore She was happy to see them and happy to be Forever at home in the land of make believe
5.
G D Dear Yeti, hello Yeti dear D7 G Everything is crazy here G G7 C The people never come outside D D7 I rarely ever have to hide G D I don’t know what is going on D7 G But clearly there is something wrong G G7 C But it’s fun to watch this human zoo D D7 G I’m doing fine what’s up with you? G D D7 Dear Sasquatch nice to hear from you D7 G G7 Over here is crazy too C Bm E Normally this time of year Am D7 We’re mobbed with climbers and their gear G D D7 But I haven’t seen a single soul D7 G G7 The sherpas must be on the dole C Bm E It’s getting warmer every day Am D D7 I’m afraid the snow will melt away G D D7 I really wouldn’t worry though D7 G G7 I’ve seen the humans come and go C Bm E I hope you’re happy over there Am D7 G Keep me posted and take care
6.
The Big Game 03:14
C G Everybody’s gonna watch the game G7 C You don’t even have to know who’s playin’ F C Am Or where it is or what it’s all about D G Just turn on your TV and check it out C G Everyone should catch it if they can G7 C In every household all across the land F C Am It will be seen by 100 million fans C G C Even if there’s no-one in the stands This promises to be the biggest yet A spectacle you never will forget Thinks of all the games you’ve ever seen before This one’s guaranteed to be much more The halftime entertainment will amaze With more stars than there are in outer space Commercial interruptions won’t be too bad Some folks just tune in to see the ads Light beer, SUVs and pizza pies Are just a few things you’ll see advertised They’ll make you laugh so hard you’ll start to cry And hopefully remember what to buy And now the big game is almost here The biggest celebration of the year It will be bigger than it ever was before And next year we’ll be back with even more
7.
O Valentine 01:43
Oh Valentine, dear Valentine What must I do to make you mine? Your lovely face I can’t forget I’m sad to say we’ve never met O Valentine you top my list Do you even know that I exist? I really cannot blame you though I am too shy to say hello I saw you out the other day I turned around and ran away Every time I hear you speak My mind goes blank my knees go weak I often think of what I’ll say And then my voice just fades away The way I feel you’re bound to know When I get up the nerve to say hello Oh Valentine, dear Valentine What must I do to make you mine? What must I do to win your heart? To say hello might be a start
8.
G C They say that Texans like to boast - they are the best, they eat the most D G Anyway that’s how the story goes G C But Houstonians will never go round bragging ‘bout the weather D They’re familiar with torrential rains D They get their share of hurricanes D The summers can be sweltering C D G And it never ever snows G C The folks in New York City who whine about humidity D C D G Wouldn’t last a day outside in Houston in July D But in the winter of seventy-three D D7 One day will live on in history G C It started out a normal day though skies were dark and cool D G Everybody went to work, the kids all went to school G C When morning recess rolled around snowflakes were falling down D C D G It looked as though a little snow was sticking to the ground G C By lunchtime it was plain to see the snow was a reality D G By then it covered up the ground and more was coming down D They said “there’s no more school for today D D7 Everyone can go outside and play!” G C CHORUS: And the snow came falling down D G And it covered up the ground G C Am Houston Texas look out below D G She’s buried beneath 3 inches of snow G C D G Teachers, students, janitors, custodians and visitors all ran out side to frolic in the white G C Everyone in town that day let all their worries melt away D G And joined their neighbors in a giant snowball fight G C When they went to bed that night the kids said their prayers D G When we wake up in the morning let the snow still be there G C They woke up in the morning the sun was shining bright D G They ran to the window and beheld a lovely sight G C Not only was the ground still covered in white D D7 But a whole extra inch had fallen overnight G C Nobody went to work or school that day throughout the town D G Because they didn’t won a plow the airport was shut down G C Everybody knew to go enjoy it while they can D G You may not live to see it snow in Houston again.
9.
G C D G Let’s go and meet the neighbors G C D G They just moved in next door G C D G Let’s go make them feel welcome G D G G C D G That’s what friends are for Hello Neighbors! G C D G The father’s name is William G D G But everyone calls him Bill Hello Bill! The mother’s name is Gertrude But everyone calls her Trudy Hello Trudy! The neighbors have four children Both of them are boys Let’s go next door and meet them And check out all their toys The older boy is Webster But everyone calls him Webble-Tebble Hello Webble-Tebble! The younger boy is William But nobody calls him Bill He’s the youngest in the family So everyone calls him Bebe Hello Bebe! I’m glad we met the neighbors They really do seem great I hope we can remember their names Let’s try to keep them straight Bill Bebe Trudy Bebe Webble-Tebble Bill Bebe Trudy Bebe Webble-Tebble Bill Bebe Trudy Bebe Webble-Tebble
10.
Talking WFMU 02:50
If you can hear me now then everybody knows You’re listening to the radio And not just any old broadcast crew We’re talking WFMU - freeform radio - heard all one the world Every year about this time they ask if we can spare a dime Say thanks for what they’re doing here - and help em last another year Every year is tough but 2020 was tougher than most - 2020 - good vision - challenging year The pandemic started up and the world shut down No more live bands coming to town Folks were stuck at home with no place to go They started listening to the radio - just like the old days - long before the pandemic Up stepped WFMU They stayed on the air with a skeleton crew Broadcasting live 24/7 On a scale of ten I’d give em an 11 Everybody’s woking from home More time to have the radio on Now if you’ve enjoyed it all year long They need your help to keep going strong As if great radio weren’t enough They’re offering up all kinds of stuff An we’re not talking some old tote bag This here’s genuine first class swag - hand made premiums lovingly assembled by individual volunteer DJs - collect em all So over the next week or two I think you know what you need to do Lets make this marathon the best Here’s a little tune so you won’t forget: W - Wonderful Radio F - Fantastic station M - They need some money U - and they’re counting on you
11.
C G Hiking through the forest I heard a mournful whine Dm G F G C And there I spied a tiny man tangled up in vines C F He said “I am a leprechaun and if you can set me free F C G C I will grant your every wish and share my luck with thee C G I freed the little fellow - he tried to run and hide Dm G F G C But he tripped beside a wishing well and fell down deep inside C F Ho shouted “help, I cannot swim!” And would have drowned no doubt F C G C But I sent down a bucket on a rope and pulled him out G C I pulled him out, I pulled him out G C C7 He would have drowned beyond a doubt F C G C CHORUS He was the luckiest leprechaun you could ever hope to see F C G C But I’m afraid that all his luck was bad as bad can be C G He said “Im truly sorry and now to make amends Dm G F G C I’ll take to a treasure where the rainbow ends D F We found the end of the rainbow but there was no pot of gold F C G C Just a rusted chamber pot packed with muck and mold G C Muck and mold, muck and mold G C Truth be told there was no gold CHORUS C G His promises and magic tricks went from bad to worse Dm G F G C And every wish he tried to grant turned out to be a curse C F A tricky little fellow - he always had a plan F C F G C But some unfortunate accident would knock him down again C G He was trampled by an elephant when he stepped upon its trunk Dm G F G C He was bitten by a rattlesnake and squirted by a skunk C F He bets on horses everyday but has never won a dime F C F G C And he’s been struck by lightning seventy-seven times C G If you’re ever in the forest and spy this tiny man Dm G F G C Turn and run away from him as quickly as you can C F And if he catches up with you I’ll tell you what to say: F G F G C These are my three wishes: please go away! C G C Go away! Go away! G C C7 This is not your lucky day! CHORUS X3
12.
Intro: G G7 C Cm G A7 D7 G G D The day I won the lottery D7 G Everyone was nice to me G C Folks I’d never seen before D D7 Were gathered round outside my door G D All at once the crowd was cleared D7 G My winning ticket disappeared G C I never got to cash it in G A7 D7 C I guess I’ll have to try again G D That’s the way the money goes D7 G That’s the way the money goes G G7 C Cm We all need money I suppose G A7 D7 C That’s the way the money goes G D Apart from taxes food and rent D7 G The miser never spent a cent G C He kept his money in a box D D7 Loaded down with chains and locks G D All his life he saved and saved D7 G He took his money to the grave G C Now the money’s underground G A7 D7 G Sprouting up all over town CHORUS G G C D G THAT’S THE WAY IT GOES G D A dollar here a dollar there D7 G Money turns up everywhere G C Throw it all into the air D D7 Let everybody grab their share G D The poor man dreams of nicer things D7 G The rich man needs security G C Always thinking ‘bout the day G A7 D7 G They’ll try to take it all away CHORUS
13.
April Fool 02:40
B F# I ain’t got the sense I was born with F#7 B I never did nothing no good B E They say that I’m strange but there’s nothing I’d change F# B No I don’t think I would if I could B F# I was born on the first day of April F#7 B I entered this world as a fool B E I’m happy to say I’m a fool to this day F# B And that’s something you can’t learn in school B F# B I’m a fool, I’m a fool E F# I don’t need to follow no rules B Eb7 E I’ve got the mind of a mule and I’m too cool for school F# F#7 B I’m a guaranteed verified fool B F# I see people pointing their fingers F#7 B I hear people laughing at me B E I’m fine on my own the world is my home F#7 B There’s no place that I’d rather be B F# If I had me a dollar F#7 B Every time I was lost or confused B E I’d just sit and grin watch the money roll in F# B And buy me a new pair of shoes B F# B I’m a fool, I’m a fool E F# I don’t need to follow no rules F# B Eb7 E I’ve got the mind of a mule and I’m too cool for school F# F#7 B I’m a guaranteed verified fool B F# B I’m a fool, I’m a fool E F# I don’t need to follow no rules F# B Eb7 E I’ve got the mind of a mule and I’m too cool for school F# F#7 B I’m a certified, bona-fide, fortified, glorified, justified verified fool
14.
E If I was the Easter Bunny A Life would be all milk and honey B Just like Peter Cottontail E I’d hop along that bunny trail E For nine or ten months every year A I could just go disappear B I wouldn’t have to do a thing E ’Til flowers reappeared in spring A F#m Then the whole wide world would think of me D E A B E I would be a big celebrity E Then I’d really have it all A I’d tour the nation’s shopping malls B Kids would come from miles around E To pick up what I’m puttin’ down E Because I am the Easter Bunny A I wouldn’t have a need for money B I could do it all unpaid E I’ll ride the float in town parades A F#m Throwing Easter eggs into the crowd D E A I know that I would make my family proud - of me
15.
D G A D G A My name is Sam and I am an unhappy clam D G I am what I am A D An unhappy clam D G People say A D G A clam should be happy and gay A D Wear a big smile every day G A D G A Clams are made that way G F#m I’ve got no eyes, ears, feet or hands B7 Em Most of my life I’ve been stuck in the sand D I’m stuck in this shell Bm If I could get out Em A7 I might find something to be happy about D G A D Oh well, I think I’ll climb back into my shell G A D I wish I had a better story to tell G A D Or something swell to sell G F#m They say that true happiness comes from within Em A7 I may go back in and start over again D G A D G A My name is Sam and I am an unhappy clam D G A D G A I am what I am - An unhappy clam D G A D I like what I am - I’m an unhappy clam
16.
C E Am The majestic redwood tree G G7 C A finer thing you’ll never see C E Am And for what it’s worth G G7 C The oldest living thing on earth C E Am Stand there at her feet G G7 C Look up into the canopy C E F Her spirit is surrounding you G G7 C You’ll feel a part of nature too C G C Climbing high - the branches touch the sky C G E Am Reaching down - the roots are underground D7 She’s strong and sound G7 Never will fall down C E Am When insects look for food or homes G G7 C They leave the redwood tree alone C E F Fires burning wild and free G G7 C Rarely harm the redwood tree C E Am A forest swallowed up in flames G G7 C Only redwood trees remain C E F Many trees will fall G G7 C But she’s still standing tall CHORUS C E Am In the 19th century G G7 C Loggers killed the redwood trees C E F They cut them down - hauled them away G G7 C Five percent remain today C E Am To protect the remaining few G G7 C It’s up to me it’s up to you C E F While you can you should go and see G G7 C The majestic redwood tree CHORUS
17.
C G C Gotta come up with a brand new song G C So you can sing along C G C First I gotta find a melody G C This one will do just fine C G C Now I think I’ll add a little harmony G C So you can sing with me C G C Now I need something to sing about G C I’ll take a look outside F C Gonna take a look in the neighbor’s yard G C I’ll climb the fence it’s not that hard F C They have a little dog so I better beware D G The grass is always greener there C G C Better go pet the neighbor’s dog G C To show I am a friend C G C We may go swimming in the neighbor’s pool G C When summer rolls around C G C Think I’ll take a walk with the neighbor’s dog G C We’ll walk around the block C G C Gonna go fishing with the neighbor’s cat G C I’ve heard that cats like fish F C I hope you have enjoyed the song G C Not too short, not too long F C You can make up your own verse D G May be better, may be worse F C I got the tune from an old folk song G C I found the words in the neighbor’s yard F C You can do it too - it ain’t too hard G C Make up your own song F C Take the cat on a fishing trip G C Then make up your own song
18.
I Remember 02:49
F C7 F I remember walking on the beach in faraway lands F C7 F I saw the sun reflected in the tiny grains of sand Bb C F They tell a tale in fine detail - the story never ends Gm C F I blinked my eyes they scattered into the wind F C7 F I remember summer nights looking up at the stars F C7 F If you can find that special star you’ll always know where you are Bb C F I remember people who have wandered far away Gm C F But like the stars the memories always stay F C7 F I remember when I was a bird and you were a fish F C7 F We’d fly and swim around the world go anyplace that we wish Bb C F That was only yesterday or so it seems to me Gm C F Was it real or was it only a dream? Gm C F Either way it’s still a fine memory
19.
C When you’re living down on Easy St - all is well and life is sweet C G Everything is perfect in your life G7 You’ll wonder how you landed here - without a worry, care or fear G7 C How everything turned out to be just right C You didn’t do it on your own - you grew up in a happy home C F With someone who is patient, kind and calm F C A You had a little help it’s true - someone was looking out for you Dm G C So take a moment now and thank your mom C Thank your mom (Thank you mom) for all she’s done (Thank you mom) C G As mothers go she’s always number one G7 Give her a hug G7 Return the love G7 C Tell her she’s the one you’re thinking of C She’s tried and true - she’s there for you C F Ain’t nothing in the world she wouldn’t do F She’ll drive you crazy but for sure C A No one will ever love you more Dm G C So don’t forget to thank your mom F She calls the shots around the home C We call her a palindrome G C Let her know you’re thinking of her now F F Mom is a special name C Backwards, forwards it’s the same D G Turn it upside down and it spells WOW C And so they say - there comes a day C G When you’ll be all grown up and move away G7 She’ll let you go - but truth be told G7 C In her heart you’re forever five years old C And all the time - you’re on her mind C F She’ll pick you up anytime you fall F C A Though she may be far away you needn’t wait for Mother’s Day Dm G C Pick up the phone and give your mom a call C Call your mom (Hello Mom) Thank your mom (Thank you mom) C G As mothers go she’s always number one G7 Return the love - give her a hug G C Tell her she’s the one you’re thinking of C She’s tried and true - she’s there for you C F Ain’t nothing in the world she wouldn’t do F She’ll drive you crazy but for sure C A No one will ever love you more Dm G C So don’t forget to thank your mom
20.
D G If I was a groundhog I’d live down underground A D And poke my head out everyday to take a look around D G I may crawl out and walk about, throw caution to the wind A D At any sign of danger I’ll head back down again G D Living down beneath the world I’d rarely see the light G Em A Don’t really matter if it’s day or night G F# But it’s plain to see B7 Em A groundhog I’ll never be D G I won’t live underground D Em I’ll be here in the town D G And I may see you around Em A So please D Be nice to me D G If I was a mockingbird I’d live up in the sky A D Looking down from high above around the world I’d fly D G I might light down and look around - find a place to stay A D At any sign of trouble I’d up and fly away G D Flying high above the world as far as I can see G Em A Riding high upon the wind so light and free G F# But it’s plain to see B7 Em A mockingbird I’ll never be D G I won’t live high in the sky D Em I’ll be here don’t ask me why D G If you see me passing by Em A Please D Be nice to me
21.
D G A child will have their fortune told D A See how their future might unfold D G The sidewalks may be paved with gold D A D Or you might live down on Slacktown Road D G When all is well and life is sweet D A You’re living down on Easy Street D G That’s when you know you need to go D A D And walk a mile down Slacktown Road F#m G If you start at the beginning F#m G And walk it to the very end Em D You’ll turn around without a sound A D And walk back again D G When night descends and summer skies D D Are filled with stars and fireflies D G A lonesome whistle whining low D A D Will lead you down to Slacktown Road D G Park the car, turn off the lights D A Beneath the stars up shining bright D G Behold another magic night D A D Filled with wonder and delight F#m G Surrounded by the unfamiliar F#m G An endless valley to explore Em D Then you’ll suddenly remember A D I’ve been down this road before D G The preacher man was right and true D A He knew the Bible through and through D G He lost his way or so we’re told D A D And ended up on Slacktown Road D G When all my time on earth is done D A I’ll look into the fading sun D G One last wish before I go D A D Just take me down to Slacktown Road. F#m G Slacktown Road is never ending F#m G It runs forever and a day Em D It may take you where you’re going A D It may carry you away
22.
G F I was gazing out the window G F On a warm September night Em G I saw a blinking orb approaching G7 C And the sky was filled with light G F Then I spied a giant spacecraft G F Flashing colors wild and weird Em G It rapidly ascended G7 C And just like that it disappeared G F Nobody would believe me G F It didn’t follow nature’s law Em G Just my imagination G7 C But I know what I saw G F So I started looking for them G F Flying objects flashing lights Em G Things that often go unnoticed G7 C Now I see them every night G F Now I’m sure that they have landed G F Invisible to you and me Em G Voices our ears can’t distinguish G7 C Shapes and colors we can’t see G F And I believe they walk among us G F Some are living in our midst Em G Just because we cannot see them G7 C Doesn’t mean they don’t exist G F We must assume that they are friendly G F They’ve been watching us for years Em G If their intention was to harm us G7 C We wouldn’t still be here G F Now everybody has a camera G F Pointed up into the sky Em G As more evidence is gathered G7 C You will agree that I am right G F Officials hide their information G F Won’t tell the public what they know Em G When the secrets are revealed G7 C Don’t say I didn’t tell you so G7 C Here come the UFOs
23.
A E7 Seventeen years they have been sleeping E7 They have been dreaming A Down underground A E7 Now all at once they are emerging E7 They’re crawling out A To fly about A D They’ll spread their wings B E (listen to the treetops ring) A F#m Looking for a loved one D E A For the few remaining days A E7 Their ghostly shells cling to the tree trunks E7 A But they’ve moved on to seek their fate A E7 High in the trees you can hear them singing E7 A Trying to find the perfect mate A D They’ll spread their wings B E They’ll sing and sing (listen to the treetops ring) A F#m Looking for a loved one D E A For the few remaining days F#m D Cicada, cicada you’ll soon be gone away Bm F#dim7 D7 Thank you for brightening our day A E7 We’ll say farewell to the cicadas E7 A The empty shells all that remain A E7 But they’ll return next generation E7 A And we’ll enjoy their song again A D They’ll spread their wings B E They’ll sing and sing (listen to the treetops ring) A F#m 17 years from now D E A
24.
I’ve walked around this planet now for ninety-seven years I’ve filled my heart with laughter and I’ve shed a thousand tears I’ve lost everything I’ve ever owned I’ve learned some things I wish I’d never known I was born in Dallas Texas in nineteen and twenty two I’ve rambled and I’ve gambled and I’ve seen a thing or two One wager that I’m sure I’ll always win I’ll bet you that the sun will shine again The sun will shine again You’ll find another friend The losers will win The sun will shine again One day a cloud of dust appeared and blotted out the sun People panicked fearing that their time on earth was done The preachers bowed their heads and knocked on wood The businessmen grabbed everything they could We lived in total darkness for a year and twenty days Lots of folk had given up and wandered far astray The faithful were rewarded in the end The cloud lifted and the sun appeared again The sun will shine again You’ll find another friend The losers will win The sun will shine again Every drop within the ocean, all creatures great and small Sing songs to tell their stories and draw pictures on the wall With no beginning and without an end Just waiting for the sun to shine again The sun will shine again You’ll find another friend The losers will win The sun will shine again
25.
G D Willie the wiggling worm D7 G Why does Willie want to wiggle and squirm? G C He wiggles around down under the ground D G The wiggliest worm in the underground town G D Wanda worm was one of a kind D7 G A whistling worm with a whimsical mind G C Wanda whistled at Willie while he wiggled along D G Willie winked at Wanda: “what a wonderful song” G D Willie started wiggling as Willie will do D7 G Without a warning Wanda’s wiggling too G C Willie wished he could whistle like Wanda can do D G But he said “whatever, I’m a wiggling dude” G D They whistled and wiggled all under the land D7 G From Walla Walla Washington to Wichita Kan G C Wandering out with the westerly winds D G Whatever the weather they’re wiggling friends G D Willie and Wanda are wiggling friends
26.
C Doug was a groundhog not too big F But he had big dreams and he loved to dig G He said ,“I love my home and family C But I could use a little change in scenery” F C He watched a red-tailed hawk fly over the mountain F G He said “I’d like to know what lies on the other side” C One way to find out C Well he dug and dug for days and days F Until he knew he was far away G Then he poked his head up out of the ground C And had a look around F C He came up in a mud hole beside a friendly pig F G Who said you’re funny looking but you sure know how to dig C You sure can dig C F The pig said it’s nice to meet you and please don’t take this wrong G C But before the farmer sees you - you’d better move along. C F Doug the Digger G C He travels underground. C F Doug the Digger G From the center of the earth to the hills high above C There never lived a critter that could dig like Doug. C F Doug went back down into the ground and set off once again G C In the history of excavation there was nothing quite like him C F At random spots around the world he would take a look around G C At any sign of danger he’d head back underground F C In the frigid frozen Arctic he met a polar bear F G He came out of the ground in Holland with tulips in his hair. C F In the sands of the Sahara he nearly died of thirst G C In the sweltering heat of the Amazon mosquitoes were the worst C F Doug the Digger G C He travels the whole world round. C F Doug the Digger G From the center of the earth to the hills high above C There never lived a critter that could dig like Doug.
27.
C Am Em G C (Spoken) You ever have one of those days when nothing seems to be going your way? No matter what you do? And you want to just give up and start all over. And I gotta figure somewhere there’s probably somebody even worse off than I am. So as much as I’d like to, I really can’t complain. C Am My ice cream’s melting all over my hands F G The video is buffering again C Am I had cereal for breakfast but it wasn’t great F G The milk is past the sell by date F G There’s a fly on the wall I tried to hit it with the broom C Am Now it’s buzzing all around the room F Dm G C But I’m feeling no pain and I can’t complain C Am My dog is angry - want’s to fight F G My swimming pool is an awful sight C Am The water’s cold and the fish won’t bite F G The frogs are croaking all through the night F G I feel like the biggest loser in town C Am My phone is cracked and now the wifi’s down F Dm G C But I’m feeling no pain and I can’t complain
28.
G E One morning without warning a pig knocked on the door C D The cat was sleeping on the couch, the dog was on the floor G B7 A cow came down the chimney wearing Santa’s beard C D Just when things were getting weird the cat just up and disappeared G Where’s that kitty cat at? G D Where’s that kitty cat at? G C Where’s that kitty cat, where’s that kitty cat G D G Where’s that kitty cat at G E In these type situations they always blame the dog C D Who still was lying on the floor sleeping like a log G B7 They called him in for questioning, they thought they smelled a rat C D The mastermind behind the disappearance of the cat G What did the diggity do? G D What did the diggity do? G C Whatever the diggity dog done did G D G The cat got up and she went and hid G Where’s that kitty cat at? G D Where’s that kitty cat at? G C Where’s that kitty cat, where’s that kitty cat G D G Where’s that kitty cat at
29.
Baby Burrito 03:13
C F G In case you haven’t been listening There’s something happening in the kitchen So everybody pay attention They’ve been cooking all night They know they have to get it right The happy parents have been waiting They’ve been long anticipating Now they’re filled with elation At the arrival of their new creation Baby Burrito Baby Burrito Se llama Pepito Baby Burrito The chalupas are a cheering The guacamole says Ole! The happy enchiladas are dancing with tostadas Through the night and all day Baby Burrito Baby Burrito Se llama Pepito Baby Burrito Am F What kind of future lies ahead F For a baby burrito? Dm What will it need to know? G G7 How big can it expect to grow? Baby Burrito Baby Burrito Se llama Pepito Baby Burrito
30.
C When I was granted three wishes G C I thought about what I could wish C Perhaps I should fly like an eagle G C Maybe swim like a fish F If I could have superpowers C F I thought about what they might be C F Best think it through and carefully choose G C Knowing that I only get three C The first one came to me easy G C I decided I wanted to fly C See the world from a different perspective G C Looking down from the sky F I jumped up and started to swim in the air C F Closed my eyes so I wouldn’t look down C F I kicked my legs, moved my arms all around G C But I couldn’t get more than five feet off the ground Em The neighborhood dogs stood below in a row C Looking up and barking at me Em Try as I might I couldn’t gain any height F Flapping my arms frantically G To all it was quite plain to see G7 C That flying just wasn’t for me C The flying was such a disaster G C I wanted to just disappear C If I could become invisible G C I’d hide in plain sight for a year F But sneaking around without being seen C F Seemed to me a little bit creepy and mean C F My heart wasn’t in it, it felt a bit weird G C At embarrassing moments I just reappeared. C So then I thought X-Ray vision G C Might be the best way to go C I could see everything hidden from sight G C And nobody could possibly know F I could see through the ceiling, the sky and the clouds C F The door, the floor and the walls C F Trouble is when you see through everything G C You can’t see nothing at all C Now for the time being G C I’ll just stay the way that I am C I tried my three superpowers G C I may never use them again
31.
C A Dm Clear blue skies G G7 C Clouds are floating by C C7 F Raindrops falling through the light G G7 C Reflecting the sun - a multicolor sight C A Dm Glowing ark G G7 C Above the sky is dark C C7 F But it’s light below G G7 C F C G And the colors of the rainbow provide a lovely show G C F C G Is it just an optical illusion G E Am Will you find a pot of gold if you reach the end D7 I’ve never found the end G G7 I’ll have to look again C A Dm Roy G Biv G G7 C If you don’t know who he is C C7 F Just remember his face G G7 C And the colors of the rainbow will neatly fall in place C A Dm Red Orange Yellow Green G G7 C Blue Indigo and Violet - colors that we’ve seen C C7 G Off we go G C Looking for a rainbow F C G G C Is it just an optical illusion G E Am Will you find a pot of gold if you reach the end D7 I’ve never found the end G G7 I’ll have to look again
32.
Turtle Race 02:31
I’m number one I was born to run And I’m not slowing down I’m well known in this town They call me Ace I’m setting the pace I’m winning the race I’ll come in first place I am the fastest turtle in the land I’m a speedy turtle try to catch me if you can I’ll win Again and again I’ll reach the end - take a nap and a victory lap Before you can really begin Every year I win the turtle race and other turtles fail I’m quicker than a 3 toed sloth and faster than a snail They call me Ace I’m setting the pace I’m winning the race I’ll come in first place I’m number one I was born to run And I’m not slowing down I’m well known in this town I am the fastest turtle in the land I’m super speedy try to catch me if you can
33.
F The dog days of summer have arrived F And summer’s still alive F C And everyone is lazy or half crazy in the heat C Folks are rocking on the porch C Or dancing by a tiki torch C F The peaches and the summer flowers are sweet F Perhaps it’s because of this F The dog star is Sirius D7 Gm The brightest start up in the summer sky C Or do we call them “Dog Days” because people show their lazy ways C F And sit and watch the summer days drift by F The dog days are here Bb It’s that time of year C Summer’s winding down F Let’s celebrate the hound F Schnauzer, Beagle, Boxer, Rottweiler Bb St Bernard, Dachshund, Viszla, Weimaraner C Pekinese, Pug, Pomeranian, Poodle F Scottie, Schnoodle, Pitbull, Labradoodle C F Dog days are here F We have a dog named Coco F She’s the sweetest soul you’ll ever know F C She greets the morning everyday with happiness and love C Her mother was a Blackface Cur C The father we’re not really sure C F But he must have been a cattle dog of sorts F We go on walks together and enjoy the summer weather D7 Gm Knowing that the summer will soon end C If you’re feeling sad and grey and missing something every day C C7 F I suggest you find a canine friend F The dog days are here Bb It’s that time of year C Summer’s winding down F Let’s celebrate the hound F Schnauzer, Beagle, Boxer, Rottweiler Bb St Bernard, Dachshund, Viszla, Weimaraner C Pekinese, Pug, Pomeranian, Poodle F Scottie, Schnoodle, Pitbull, Labradoodle F Bloodhound, Foxhound, Irish Wolfhound Bb Bassett Hound, Greyhound, Bluetick Coonhound C Springer Spaniel, Whippet, Yorkie F Shiz Tsu, Bulldog, Husky, Corgi C F Dog days are here
34.
C F When I get my Tesla I’ll take you for a ride G C We’ll drive to Lookout Mountain - see what’s on the other side C F The Tesla is electric - you gotta plug it in G C We’ll ride until the power runs out then charge it up again C G C When I get my Tesla C G C When I get my Tesla C F For years I lived in Brooklyn and I always had a car G C They knew me at the Flat Fix I never went too far C F You couldn’t drive a total wreck or something nice and clean G C The ideal Brooklyn city car was something in between F C If it looked worth stealing it would vanish from your yard G C But if it looked too broken down someone would steal the parts C G C Now I’m ready for a Tesla C G C Someday I’ll get a Tesla C F Now I see Teslas everywhere - what a fine machine G C More and more electric cars - people thinking green C F What do Tesla owners have that I ain’t got? G C For on they have a Tesla and brother that’s a lot. F C People say I can’t afford one - it’s just a hopeless dream G C But when I get my Tesla they’ll want to ride with me C G C When I get my Tesla
35.
C F C I’m going on a trip C F C In a silver rocket ship A Dm Powered by a tiny microchip G C I’m going on a trip C F C Destination Outer space C F C It seems to me an empty lonely place A Dm No one will recognize my face G C Destination Outer Space C F C I’ll be gone before you hear this song C F C But I should return before too long A Dm I’m never sure if I am right or wrong G C I’ll be gone before you hear this song F C I’m going on a trip F F In a silver rocket ship F C Am Though I will be going far away G7 C I’ll be back someday C F C Tell the kids that I’ll be back home soon C F C I should be home before the end of June A Dm I’ll try to bring them something from the moon G C Tell the kids that I’ll be back home soon
36.
Scarecrow Joe was a kind gentle soul Out in the cornfield high on a pole That’s all he’d known since the day he was born Stuck up on a pole looking down at the corn The crows were aware he was just full of straw Perched on his shoulder they’s giggle and caw They posed for pictures on top of his hat But Joe wasn’t really too bothered by that Most of the time he was all on his own Out in the cornfield completely alone He couldn’t climb down and go walk around He wondered could happiness ever be found? Stuck up on a pole all night and all day If anyone visits gotta scare them away Tormented and laughed at by crows and squirrels Seemed like he loneliest job in the world. Farmer Jane wondered while picking the corn Why is our scarecrow so sad and forlorn? Something occurred to her right there and then Perhaps Scarecrow Joe just needs a friend So she sewed up an outfit and stuffed it with straw The loveliest scarecrow you ever saw She called her Sue Ellen set her right next to Joe Poor sad lonely Joe When Joe spotted Sue Ellen the world tuned bright The feeling was mutual - love at first sight No longer lonely his dream had come true He said to Sue Ellen I’m sticking with you. Sunrise filled the skies with warm golden light They counted the stars in the cool autumn night
37.
October Song 02:46
D C Come October, the summer is over D C And the days are getting shorter D C And the nights are getting colder D G And the leaves fall down from the trees G Em They cover the ground Em C Rustling sounds C D As we walk around D C The air is crisp and cool D C And the kids are back in school D C Golden fields bearing apples and pumpkins D G The trees - they’re really something G Em The leaves are aflame Em C Red yellow and orange C D Nothing rhymes with orange D C Acorns and nuts are being gathered D C And the squirrels are getting fatter D C The nuts disappear as soon as they fall D G The squirrels have taken them all G Em They haul them away Em C To a secret location C D Food for the winter D Winter D G Is just round the corner G Em But it’s still October Em C Don’t worry about Winter C D Enjoy the Autumn D G O lovely October
38.
C F C G Do you like the radio? Yes we like the radio C F C G Turn on your radio Listen to the radio F G F G Radio, Radio C F C G Sending signals through the air You can hear them anywhere C F C G A message from the human race Blasting into outer space F G F G Radio waves, radio waves C F C G Scanning up and down the dial Something there will make you smile C F C G What station do you listen to? WFMU F Fm Please Dear DJ will you play me a song C A I haven’t heard it in so very long Dm G But if I hear it now it will brighten up my day C F C G You might be riding in your car doesn’t matter where you are C F C G Red light, green light stop and go Listen to the radio FG FG Radio Radio C F C G Technology will come and go Don’t forget the radio C F C G Another station you might try Sirius XM Kids Place Live F Fm Please dear DJ can you play a request C A A dedication to the one I love best Dm G If she hears it on the airwaves she’ll know it’s from me C F C G Do we like the radio? Yes we like the radio C F C G Do we like the radio? Yes we like the radio F G F G F G Radio Radio Radio
39.
I’m a big black cat, my eyes are green My favorite day is Halloween I don’t care much for the neighborhood cats I’d rather hang out with spiders and bats Skeletons, witches, mummies and ghosts These are the creatures that I like the most Dm C On Halloween I like to trick or treat E Am Find me something sweet to eat Dm Am I’m telling you now so you’ve been warned E Better not give me any candy corn The moon comes up and the sun goes down And I’ll be creeping all around the town You cross my path and your luck will change Before you know it you’ll be feeling strange They say I’m bad luck but I’m really not mean I just like to have fun on Halloween On Halloween I like to trick or treat Find me something sweet to eat I’m telling you now so you’ve been warned Better not give me any candy corn I’m a big black cat my eyes are green My favorite day is Halloween
40.
On this very day in history All at once you came to be So let’s celebrate, Celebrate the day Where have you been, what have you done? Another trip around the sun Another year you’ve been here Today we’ll celebrate That’s what we’ll do Every day we’ll celebrate Today it’s all about you Close your eyes and make a wish Wishing for that special gift On your birthday A time to sing, a time to shout It’s time to blow those candles out Let’s eat some cake, let’s celebrate You’re younger than you’ll be tomorrow Older than you were yesterday You’ll never be this age again So enjoy it while you can Today is a very special day We hope everything goes your way So have a happy birthday
41.
Bb D7 Eb Bb A possum is good but they’re misunderstood Eb F Bb My true nature folks don’t understand Bb D7 Eb Bb I’m a marsupial and that’s pretty cool Eb F Bb Just accept me for what I am Bb D7 Eb Bb I sing you my song I won’t be here very long Eb F Bb But I’m happy with the life that I’ve lead Bb D7 Eb Bb I’m only here for two to three years Eb F Bb Including time spent playing dead Bb D7 Eb Bb The raccoons break in and knock over the cans Eb F Bb And they scatter the trash all around Bb D7 Eb Bb But I’m the one found with the trash on the ground Eb F Bb It’s a shame but I get the blame F Eb Bb People see me in the garbage and think I’m unclean F Eb F They look at my teeth and think that I look mean Bb D7 Eb Bb I have 50 teeth but I rarely will bite Eb Bb F Bb An even when threatened I don’t put up a fight Bb D7 Eb Bb I groom myself daily and I eat all the ticks Eb Bb C F Five thousand a year and I rarely get sick Bb D7 Eb Bb Yeah I eat all the vermin, rodents and fleas Eb F Bb But I never get rabies and I’m free of disease Bb D7 Eb Bb When I feel threatened my body shuts down Eb F Bb And I give off a powerful smell Bb D7 Eb Bb It doesn’t make sense but it’s my only defense Eb F Bb And it generally serves me pretty well Bb D7 Eb Bb They say it’s just a trick and they poke me with a stick Eb F Bb Come watch the possum play dead Bb D7 Eb Bb They gather around as I lie on the ground Eb F Bb And I’ll tell you some things I’ve heard said: Bb D7 Eb Bb People say “good grief, the creature’s got 50 teeth Eb F Bb And he smells like an old bag of bones Bb D7 Eb Bb See that pointy little head - he likes to play dead Eb F Bb And his face looks just like George Jones
42.
Bb Thanksgiving is tradition Bb F We celebrate across the land F A chance to spend some time together F Bb Eat as much as we can Your mom’s up early in the kitchen Been cooking for three days There’s a TV turned on somewhere Bot no one’s watching the parade Waiting for your Dallas cousins You get to see them twice a year Easter time you drive to Dallas On Thanksgiving they come here When your grandfather comes to visit A suit and tie on every day That’s because he is a gentleman And he likes to dress that way The group assembles at the table One by one they take the floor Each in turn will have their moment To tell what they are thankful for Roasted turkey oyster dressing Potatoes, beans, cranberry sauce Tofu for the vegetarians Root vegetables for all The meal is delicious The feast is a delight And even though you’ve eaten way too much There’s always room for pie We’re thankful for each other For the sun the stars the trees And someday when we’re older We’ll be thankful for the memories
43.
C Em Am C When I was your age all the world was a stage F C Dm G We waited around with our feet on the ground C Em Am C Back then times were tough, we all had it rough F C G C But we never complained about the fire and rain C Em Am C There were no mobile phones, computers or drones F C Dm G We made the best with what we had, the earth was still flat C Em Am C And our neighbors next door had a pet dinosaur F C G C They kept it in a cage when I was your age C Em Am C When you get to be as old as me F C Dm G I wonder what kind of future you’ll see C Em Am C Commuting to Mars with invisible cars F C Dm G You won’t need to eat or drink - won’t even need to think C Em Am C Robots and machines will take care of your needs F C G C Won’t have to do a thing to be a human being Fmaj7 Cmaj7 But we must forward Fmaj7 Cmaj7 Can’t live in the past A7 Dm Remembering the good old days G G7 They were too good to last C Em Am C When I was your age there was so much to do F C Dm G We made our own shoes and we grew our own food C Em Am C And the neighbors next door had a pet dinosaur F C G C They kept in a cage when I was your age C Em Am C Yes the neighbors next door kept a pet dinosaur F C G C Locked up in a cage when I was your age
44.
G D G C G There’s a brand new dance G D G C G D All across the land G C D G You’ve got to learn it if you can D G C G You want to know how D G C G I’m telling you now D G C G Wave your arms around D G C G Now scratch your head G C D G C G And jump around on the bed G C G D G C G D Super Spunky Funky Monkey Super Spunky Funky Monkey D G C G A family of monkeys D G C G Invented the dance D G C G Jumping on the le divan D G C G They lived in France D G C G A monkey would fall D G C G The doctor was called G C D G At the doctor’s command the dance was banned across the land D D7 When something is banned it becomes something G C G D G C G D Super Spunky Funky Monkey Super Spunky Funky Monkey D G C G So don’t be slow D G C G Fads come and go G C D G C G Show everyone you’re in the know D G C G Monkey see, Monkey do D G C G You know that you can learn it too D G C G Wave your arms around D G C G Now scratch your head G C D G C G And jump around on the bed G C G D G C G D Super Spunky Funky Monkey Super Spunky Funky Monkey Em C You may remember Macarena Am F The Loco-Motion and the Twist Bb A The Bump The Jerk and The Hustle A7 D D7 They were nothing like this G C G D G C G D Super Spunky Funky Monkey Super Spunky Funky Monkey
45.
E Christmas tunes are all you’ll hear E B E E7 The last two months of the year A E Television, radio and robo-calls F# B In the parking lot of the shopping malls B E Do you hear what I hear? B E E7 Fa la la la la la la A Am Carolers gathered outside the door E C# We gave them figgy pudding yet they still want more A B E But we still love the holiday music every year E Sing a song, strike up the band E A E E7 Singing in a winter wonderland A E The kids in school say “let it snow” F# B The man in red says “ho ho ho” B E Jingle bells are jingling B E E7 There’s magic in the air A Am Halls are decked with boughs of holly E C# ’Tis the season to be jolly A B E Joy to the world and happy holidays to one and all E The family’s here and you can bet E B E E7 There will be relatives you’ve never even met A E All decked out in red and green F# B The ugliest sweaters you’ve ever seen B E Christmas lights are twinkling B E E7 The neighborhood is merry and bright A Am So much to do, so much to see E C7 The cat is climbing up the Christmas tree A B E Joy to the world and happy holidays to one and all
46.
A D A Sleighbells ring D B7 E Angels sing A D D Good tidings they bring D E A Angels sing A D A Celebrate the year D B7 E Spread the Christmas cheer A D A Ring the bells D E A A joyful Noel C#7 F#m The year is nearly over D E A new year begins A D A Enjoy the days D E A With family and friends A D A Silent night D B7 E Stars are shining bright A D A Silent night D E A Holy night A D A Peace on earth D B7 E Goodwill to one and all A D A Joyful mirth D E A Peace on earth

about

At the beginning of 2021 Roger Sayre, the host of Double Dip Recess on WFMU, challenged Key Wilde to write and record a new original song each week to be played on the program broadcast over the WFMU airwaves. This is a collection of all the songs from 2021 presented in the order they appeared. 2022 and 2023 to follow. All images / artwork Key Wilde ©2023

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released February 2, 2024

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Key Wilde & Mr Clarke New York, New York

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